Was there a moment when you realized you were no longer young? A hot flash, a joint creaking, an ache you’d never had before?
If you found that moment challenging, you’re not alone.
“This stage of life can be difficult—mentally, you may feel 10 to 20 years younger, but your body is suggesting otherwise,” says UNC Health internal medicine doctor Anita Skariah, DO. “You may need to adjust some habits, but you’ll discover new strengths that produce joy in these decades.”
You can’t stop the clock, but there are things you can do in your 40s and 50s that will make this time—and the decades beyond—healthier and happier.
1. Expand your exercise routine.
If you spent your 20s and 30s doing high-impact workouts like running or boot camps, it’s time to include more joint-friendly options.
“It’s really important for runners in their 40s to include cross-training, because you begin to feel the impact on your joints when pounding the pavement,” Dr. Skariah says. Swimming and biking are good low-impact options.
Add stretching for flexibility and strength training to build muscle, both of which will help with long-term mobility.
“As we age, we lose muscle mass, so strength training is essential to preserve and develop muscle,” Dr. Skariah says. “Muscle keeps your metabolism fired up.”
And if you do nothing else, start walking.
“Walking is truly our pension plan for later,” Dr. Skariah says. “Data shows it’s a preventive strategy for dementia, because it keeps blood flowing to the brain, nourishing it. It also helps our entire musculoskeletal system stay limber.”
2. Evaluate your food and alcohol intake.
Heathy eating is important at every age, but midlife is a good time to evaluate if your nutrition is supporting your lifestyle and goals.
As we age, our metabolism slows down, making weight gain likelier. That puts you at risk for more chronic conditions, including heart disease, diabetes, kidney disease and some cancers.
“We have clear data that the Mediterranean diet, which emphasizes fresh fruit and vegetables, whole grains, olive oil, lean meats and fish, and the DASH diet, which decreases sodium, are the best ways to approach diet as we age,” Dr. Skariah says. “There are a lot of easy recipes out there for getting started.”
Remember that small changes add up, too—you could start by reducing your intake of ultraprocessed foods, which are often high in salt, fat and sugar, or focus on adding new vegetables to your rotation. It can be helpful to meet with a dietitian to talk about your specific nutrient needs.
It’s also a good time to consider your alcohol intake.
“The liver doesn’t metabolize alcohol as well as we age,” Dr. Skariah says. “And while previously we thought that a glass of wine might have some benefit, the pendulum is swinging in the other direction as we obtain more data on the long-term effects of alcohol, such as a link with colon cancer.”
3. Prioritize sleep.
Sleep is vital to your physical and mental health, but as we age, it can be harder to feel rested.
Some changes might be due to age: Perimenopause can cause hot flashes and night sweats that keep you awake, while your risk for sleep apnea increases, affecting sleep quality.
You may have developed some bad sleep hygiene habits over the years that are catching up with you now, such as an evening cocktail, which may make you feel relaxed before bed but affects deep sleep, or caffeine in the late afternoon, which can affect your ability to sleep long after the immediate buzz has gone away.
“The brain is like our computer, and it needs to be powered down in a similar manner,” Dr. Skariah says. “We develop many habits that interfere with our brain’s ability to shut down and know it’s time for sleep.”
If you’re tossing and turning, you may need to retrain your brain on how and when to sleep by getting back to the basics: a consistent bedtime and wake time, a calming bedtime routine and ensuring your environment is quiet, cool and dark, with no screens.
4. Take time for self-care.
This can be a very busy time of life: You may be balancing career, relationships, children and aging parents, all while navigating emotions about midlife and aging.
“You may really be pushing yourself, multitasking and caretaking others,” Dr. Skariah says. “Remember that we give out of overflow. You can’t effectively pour into others if there’s not enough filling your own cup, which is why you have to take time for self-care.”
The good news: self-care can overlap with other things on this list—a walk in the sunshine or your favorite healthy meal will help with your energy levels and mood.
It’s also a great time to consider if there’s a new activity or skill you want to try. As your kids become more independent, taking a class or exploring a new hobby could add to your happiness.
It’s not uncommon to struggle with identity and self-confidence in middle age. If you’re noticing significant changes in your stress or mood, talk to your doctor.
“It’s important to recognize when you don’t feel like yourself, when you’re not able to accomplish what you need and want to do,” Dr. Skariah says. “Navigate these thoughts with a provider you trust.”
5. See your primary care provider regularly.
You don’t have to navigate these midlife changes alone—your primary care provider can help you manage age-related concerns, such as menopause or prostate health.
“For women who are experiencing hot flashes, mood swings and other symptoms related to menopause, we have more strategies than ever to help with this transition,” Dr. Skariah says. “Men also might be noticing that they’re getting up more often in the night to urinate, no longer having a steady stream or taking longer to urinate. There are strategies to help with this also.”
Your primary care provider can help you determine which screenings for cancer and chronic conditions you need in these decades, based on screening guidelines and your personal risk factors.
Most importantly, your provider can be a trusted sounding board for anything new you’re experiencing.
“We can help you filter through what’s normal for this stage of life versus a warning sign,” Dr. Skariah says.
Questions about midlife? Talk to your doctor. If you need a doctor, find one near you.